Event 8: Rise of the Fat Kid
Published February 20, 2012Event 8 became one of the most thrilling evenings of our series. All the required elements for an epic poker movie were there: horrifying weather conditions, an unpredictable line-up, heroic winners, a magnificent soundtrack by Jethro Tull and… a bad ending. The tension in the top of the rankings grew a little, but for me it was another losing session…
With a starting line-up consisting of the hosting Aces, Quattro Cane-Iz, Iranian Dutchman, Pseudo Pro and the Fat Kid, the guys played an already classic first hour: the Fat Kid took his traditional first hour chiplead with the Iranian Dutchman and the Pseudo Pro donking half their stack away. It must be said, the guy flopped top pair every time this night. -event notes say:’Fabster enters the game and makes sexual remark’- The biggest pot he won however was the result of flopping the absolute nuts (tens full) against the Pseudo Pro. The dynamic of the game anyhow changed for the first time when suddenly Uncle Fil entered the gigantic kitchen, out of the blue but packed with food, sloefkes and loads of mental bluffs.
While I was still waiting for myself, it appeared however that the Fat Kid remained completely undisturbed under these sinister circumstances. He even won another big pot against the Pseudo Pro by spiking the flushnuts on the river against a flopped two pair. The game really became a mine field for the Pseudo Pro in this stage, as he was smoothly taken up the ass again in the next hand, when Fabster rivered a full house with A4 on a AAxx4 board against his AQ. This is when I finally reached Stalingrad myself, making an heroic entrance on the musical notes of ‘Thick As A Brick’, the best song of all time. And why wait for a smoke break if you can have one right away?
I just sat down to play a couple of hands when this sick game took another turn as the doorbell rang again. A few seconds later the table was stunned once more: there was Grinder, coming right from the Golden Circle where he dodged a babysit. This was the final blow for me: not only was there suddenly an aggressive player right in front of me, but also the Toilet Per Person rate in the room dropped to 1/9 at that point. Like that wasn’t already enough, Grinder immediately started a second round of collectively ridiculizing me by making compliments at my ‘epic haircut’. His other neighbour (Aces) also suffered from his presence, as he headed towards a first losing session.
But except for Fabster, who collected some important points for the second place battle, there was only one big winner in Event 8: Fat Kid. This time he stayed focused like a chess-player, remained calm if somebody asked im if he had a full house after a final bet on the river (“Neje.”) and didn’t hesitate to fire river bets the size of 500 big blinds. He revealed his secret after the game as he confessed that he had eentje kroemgetrokke earlier that week. Curious when that starts to work for me, as I’m experiencing a negative correlation on that matter.
As I forgot to take pictures this night, I will present an extra brand new BiscottiPoker feature this week: BiscottiPoker Classics. We’ll kick off with an historic moment from Quattro Cane-Iz, as I thank him for contributing the smooth graph to the leaderboard.
BiscottiPoker Classics: Cane-Iz shows the table the first straight flush of our homegame during the hot spring of 1984.
Leaderboard (total points+latest result):
1. Aces 266 (-34)
2. Quattro Cane-Iz 87 (-28)
3. Pseudo Pro 81 (+15)
4. Fabster 52 (+30)
5. Iranian Dutchman 19 (+9)
6. Gust9999 14 (-4)
7. Uncle Fil -69 (-56)
8. Fat Kid -72 (+103)
9. Miyagi -160
10. Biscotti -259 (-35)
Event 6: #Uncle Fil
Published January 20, 2012Hashtagnight at Uncle Fil last time, with some good results for Fabster and Quattro Cane-Iz concerning the ranking. But what about my own achievements? Well, I thought my last performances already cut the head, but I added another losing session to my rankings: -29 points. But the ranking is not that important in my opinion, because overall I’m still about 340 up.
With Aces being absent, the starting line-up consisted of Uncle Fil, Gust ‘Crushing Grinder’ 9999, Pseudo-Pro, Fabster (who was just on a lunchbreak from work), Iranian Dutchman and the LP Genesis Live. While they preserved that last one like a bottle of precious wine, it was Mister Gershwin who brought them a first musical hand, with Fabster making the last bet before the song ended, resulting in a successful bluff against Uncle Fil. This was not the last time Fabster would shove a lot of chips in the middle, certainly after he completely confused the Pseudo Pro by stating that ‘hashtag’ is an actual word used by human beings.
Luckily I brought my own hashtags, which immediately helped me to crush the Grinder’s Kings with a set of neuffies. Fabster quickly recognized the danger that had come to the table and left with 45 points, being replaced by Quattro Cane-Iz, who you can always wake up for a decent christmas party in January. But let’s face it: the Magical Flying Fabster was right in his decision to avoid Biscotti. This is something the Pseudo Pro will never learn, as he lost almost his complete stack after I figured I had the best hand. Other players would have folded in that tough spot, but by sending a lot of mental staredowns and subtly interrogating this guy, I made an heroic call.
This was the beginning of an epic period with lots of things being very epic. First I shoved with more chips than I expected against The Grinder, who was also pretty deep due to a lot of gifts by the Iranian Dutchman in the six hands he played. We splitted the pot and so did the Pseudo Pro and Quattro Cane-Iz a couple of times when the latter one catched some miracle christmas cards. This made him the second winner of the evening, only followed by Peter Gabriel and the guy from the nightshop. Maybe Cane-Iz can still be a threat to leader Aces, or wil somebody else stand up in the four remaining events? Let’s see when the club is open.
Leaderboard (total points+latest result):
1. Aces 300
2. Quattro Cane-Iz 109 (+31)
3. Fabster 40 (+45)
4. Iranian Dutchman 26 (-17)
5. Gust9999 1 (-41)
6. Uncle Fil -13 (+9)
7. Pseudo Pro -26 (+3)
8. Biscotti -144 (-29)
9. Miyagi -160
10. Fat Kid -175
All-in Night @ Biscotti
Published September 20, 2011Hello friends of poker. This is the report of what was probably the sickest homegame our crew ever had. After the abandonment of Quatro Cane-Iz’ crib I decided to host a game myself. It proved to be a big success, as bluffs, perfect reads, huge pots and Coca-Cola were all over the place.
The beginning of the night was kind of depressing, as everybody was disappointed by the disappearance of The Wall. As you know, the wall is the wall and it’s hard to replace such monuments. I myself was more touched by it then I could have imagined, resulting in the loss of some big pots early on.
Especially the Fat Kid took advantage of this, quickly becoming one happy chipleader in the beginning, as you can see on the picture. His aggression was overwhelming and went beyond the game, as he personally excluded the new player on the table from participating in our new project. Few minutes later my first buy-in was already gone when my AK lost to the J9 of the Pseudo Pro. I tried to soothe the atmosphere by introducing my wife but this was fruitless: the Pseudo Pro took a chunk of my stack by professionally Ivo’ing me and the Fat Kid crushed Cane-Iz’ pair of fours with AK.
Rebuys followed each other quickly and cold decks were rather rule instead of exception. First the Iranian Dutchman doubled thanks to a flush over flush against the new guy and subsequently it was my turn to double with T7 against the Pseudo Pro’s 65 on a T654 board, winning both river runs (pic). I expected everything to run smoothly from this moment on, sitting back for a while with the inspiring sounds of Mister Bob Marley on the background. But then came the turning point of the evening with a fatal cola crash of the new guy. Absolute chipleader Pseudo Pro was so distracted that he started to clean the whole room like a prostyle houseman, losing his complete stack of a gazillion big blinds shortly afterwards by watering the table with chips.
Meanwhile Adam ‘Fabster’ B. entered the game and I placed his shallow stack between Cane-Iz and myself, ready to eat this fresh fish. However, this plan failed completely when he ate my stack by beating my two pair with a dirty set. This was a big mental hit, because I’d just doubled with a tremendous call with JT against the Iranian Dutchman’s QT on a KJxx board. As you see, every player experienced some big up & downs, nobody could escape from it. Even the Fat Kid had a mental breakdown, suddenly confessing he lost the love of his life by playing at our homegame instead of visiting the local pubs in his hometown. One player however was able to turn the tides right on time, Quatro Cane-Iz. After putting on The Very Best of the Hollies, he went like a crazy pokermotherfucker for an hour and collected an enormous stack. I believe he even missed the blitz visit of online grinder Gust9999, who just returned from Spain, spending his online profits.
And Biscotti? In the end I even ran break-even thanks to tripling up with a flusdraw (as you see, my shoves are faster than the speed of light) and some extreme luck in the legendary luckgames. Till next time, when it’ll be serious business with this new concept going on. More about that later. Ciao!
The Biscottis
Published April 6, 2010Now how does that sound as the new HBO series? Not bad if you ask me! I’m a big fan of The Sopranos, I can sometimes watch like six episodes in a row with some 40 hot dogs on the fire for the moments I get hungry. It’s also an ideal distraction after playing a couple of hours of poker on the net.
I think I would be a good maffia member myself some day and it would be great if I would get my own TV series then. But what did I notice the other day? I’m already in The Sopranos!! Tony went to Dr. Melfi and he brought her something. He opened the box and asked ‘Biscotti?’ That was so awesome man. So I started googling on sopranos+biscotti and guess what I found? Apparently Tony’s sister Barbara was played by Danielle Di Vecchio and she started her own bakery six years ago: Biscotti Di Vecchio!. Now I’m so gonna order some cookies there.
What else happened in my thrilling life? Well, I bought a tremendous poster with six beautiful poepkes on it, all bodypainted. I have a picture for you:
But you think that’s all! Wrong! It has been told to me that each bodypaint represents an album of some rock group from the seventies. Now how cool is that? Rock on babies!
Posted in music, tv series | 
barbara soprano, biscotti, bodypaint poster, danielle di vecchio, dr. melfi, HBO, sopranos | 
Leave a commentClonie Gowen is a honey
Published September 20, 2009Hey don’t say that’s just like my opinion, because it’s Gus Hansen who states it on Poker After Dark. Gus Hansen is playing with five hot grapes on this episode and Clonie makes a very good lay down:
Wow, Gus Hansen is really sitting in heaven here with all the pretty ladies. Did you notice how hot Vanessa Rousso is with that hat? I have kind of the same hat baby! But what the hell: is Erika Schoenberg really engaged to David Benyamine??!!! So this chick isn’t only very pretty but she can also cook very good? I choose you Erika, marry me!
Btw, I was at a party the other day and I had a great time. I didn’t plan to party at first but then we ran into some American chicks from Los Angeles and they decided to go to the party with Biscotti. When we had arrived over there I didn’t see them anymore but I couldn’t care less because the DJ was playing Caravan Palace, awesome. In the end I was kicked from the festival area because some security moron thought I was doin’ drugs, like I didn’t stop already for like a gazillion times. Party was over anyway so I didn’t care. Tell next time!
Poll
Loading ...